Oh 2017, how can you be measured? (Ok, I just have to do this because I can’t get the song out of my head since titling the post! Listen to this as you read the rest for a little theme music).
I know it’s cliche, but I like taking time in December and January to reflect on the past year, make goals for the future, and recalibrate my perspectives, attitudes and lifestyle. It’s like a good “spring cleaning” but for my heart and mind!
Medical Year In Review
Part of this yearly check-up involves looking at fun things like the budget, bills, schedules, and what changes need to be made with our resources for next year. Something I did a few weeks ago was itemize all my health bills for 2017. I couldn’t help myself and tallied all the different appointments and labs. Basically it boils down to 23 Dr. Appointments and consults with 9 healthcare pros, 9 blood draws, 4 ultrasounds, 1 x-ray, and 3 other too-weird-to-say-out-loud labs.
It truly felt like way more than that was going on, but I’m thankful it wasn’t! I’m also so thankful to have a husband who goes with me to pretty much every blood draw and followup appointment. He’s been my note-taker and protocol leader all year.
Best. Man. Ever.
Though 2017 wasn’t easy, I think we ended it on some high notes health wise (at least, that’s how I’m looking at it). We have a surprisingly clear picture of what we’re going to be dealing with in 2018 (more on all that later) *January 15, 2018 diagnosis reveal posted here!*, and this has me hopeful that recovery is closer than ever!
Could 2018 be the year?
I also like measuring how the year went by checking up on my faith. One of the things I do is look through my journal entries for the year. Am I still mulling over the same things? How am I different? Have I changed where I needed to?
One of the passages I wrote down last January was Matthew 6:25-34, and I think I still need to keep processing this one.
Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘what shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.
I can be stressed about so much in life, but what hits home in this verse is stressin’ over “what you will eat or what you will drink”. My illness has made it virtually impossible to go out to eat or even hang out with friends if food is involved. My diet has become so limited that any travel plans or simple night out with Mr. C. has to be carefully thought through with backup snacks and medicine packed. Throughout this year I’ve tried so hard to keep calm and live in the peace God offers, but I’ve gotta admit failure in this one. Instead of focusing on what I have to do with my problems, I should be remembering what God can do with them and trust them to His care.
Life is too short to be spending one more minute on anxiety! I really REALLY don’t want to be that stressed out girl anymore!
So, here’s to 2018 and a year of more peace, less stressin’, more of God and less of me, and of course some hair-whippin’ good times!
How about you? Are you finding anxiety hurting your life and stealing your peace?
Here’s a simple prayer.
Lord, I’m so worried and stressed about so much these days. Little things just push me over the edge. Please let Your peace rule in my heart (Colossians 3:15), and help me to cast all of my cares on You (1Peter 5:7). Amen
You can also read about Depression, Anxiety, and Panic Disorder here . Chronic illness can weaken and damage the brain and body so much, and I share a little of my story and what I learned during some of those darkest days with depression, anxiety, and panic disorder.
I hope your 2018 is filled with health and peace,